GreenRoom Comedy

The Return...

2006-07-02T22:02:00.000+12:00

And after a considerable leave of absence the Green Room returns for a very special farewell gig.

Cori Gonzalez-Macuer has been a Wellington Comedy icon for a number of years now. He won the Raw Comedy competition in his first year of comedy, and has gone from strength to strength since then culminating in his winning of this year's Billy T Award. He's moving to the UK in about 3 1/2 weeks time so we at Green Room are effing lucky to get him in one of his final gigs in Wellington.

Frankly, you shouldn't need more of an excuse than that so make sure you come along, Sunday the 16th.

Bad News

2006-06-06T23:42:00.000+12:00

I'm afraid that this month's green room has been cancelled.

The Laugh Fest has been going on for the last 3 weeks and the acts all need a break for a bit.

But don't worry, we'll be back in July with refreshed comics, new jokes, and some bloody good times.

News from the fest:

Cori Gonzalez-Macuer took out the coveted Billy T award - one of the top awards you can win in this country for comedy, we love Cori, he's a Wellington dude, a great comic and good mate of mine so well done my friend.

As well as that Steve Wrigley won the Spirit of the Festival for Wellington meaning Steve embodies what comedy should be about, he also is a great comic and a good friend of mine so we love that too.

Wellington was overly represented in all facets! I myself took part in the 2006 Raw Comedy Competition, I didn't win but Alex Hawley did and rightfully so. Alex and I started comedy at the same time and so he's been my growing buddy through this thing. Well done! I'm bloody proud of you.

All the Wellington Comics who took part showed that this is the home of NZ Comedy no matter what those buggers say up north. So if you went along to a show, had a laugh or hell if you just looked at a poster and thought "good on ya" then thank you.

It was the best festival ever according to those in the know.

I look forward to seeing you next month.

Jew

Next Green Room on Sunday 14 May

2006-05-10T14:10:00.000+12:00

Come along, bitches (males dogs are also welcome)

2006-05-02T17:49:00.000+12:00

(click on it to see it properly)

The above is my parody of Jarrod Baker's Newtown Ghetto Anger.

You should fully check it out, it's hilarious.

And the two guys look like balls.

Because everyone loves a stereotype...

2006-04-13T11:17:00.000+12:00

Bagels
4 to 4 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 packages active dry yeast
1 1/2 cups warm water, about 110°
3 tablespoons sugar
1 tablespoon salt
1 tablespoon sugar

In a mixing bowl, combine 1 1/2 cups of the flour and the yeast. Combine water, the 3 tablespoons sugar, and salt; pour over flour mixture. Beat at low speed of electric mixer for 1/2 minute, scraping bowl a few times. Stir in as much flour as you can mix with a spoon.
Turn out onto a lightly floured board and knead in enough flour to make a moderately stiff dough that is smooth and elastic (about 8 minutes). Cover with a clean towel and let rest 10 minutes.

Cut into 12 equal portions; shape each portion into a smooth ball. Punch a hole in the center of each ball and pull gently to make a 1 1/2 inch hole in the center. Place on a greased baking sheet. Cover and let rise 20 minutes. Broil bagels 5 inches from the heat for 4 minutes, turning once. Tops shouldn't brown. Heat 1 gallon of water with 1 tablespoon of sugar; bring to a boil then reduce heat. Put bagels in water and begin timing when they rise to the top. Cook about 3 to 4 bagels at a time for about 3 minutes, turning once. Drain. Place on greased baking sheet. Bake at 375° for 25 to 30 minutes. Makes about 1 dozen bagels.

Didn't They Do Well?

2006-04-10T10:42:00.000+12:00

Once again the Green Room exceeded all expectations, the crowd was even stronger than the last one and the acts put on a fine show.

Highlights include:

"You ever wonder how people become Gynaecologists? Maybe litle Tommy was sitting in the corner one day and his friend just yells at him "Oi Tommy, you're a cunt" suddenly Tommy has a revelation..." - Emma Olsen

"Martial Arts Journalism...not journalism about martial arts, but instead of interviewing them, you fight them, then write about that" - Jarrod Baker

"How did the Israelis take 40 years to go from Egypt to Israel? I've looked at the map, it's only as far as from Wellington to Levin, now if you were going to Levin I could understand the procrastination..." - MC Alex Hawley.

So all in all a bloody good night out was had by all.

Special thanks to Clayton Fingers who contacted me, and had the nerve to get up there in front of all those people and perform. And what a performance he did. The creepiest, yet funniest hands ever.

Don't forget kids, there are comedy gigs all over the show right now so get out there and support them!

Upcoming gigs:
Rhino Radar launch party, Thursday, April 13, 8.30pm at Indigo -> a skit show starring most of Wellington's comedians, almost guaranteed to be hilarious.

Comedy Underground, another Sunday night gig, on April 30th, starring Taika Cohen who has had an Oscar nomination.

Jerome Chandrahasen also runs a gig out at the Buzz Bar in the Hutt Valley, the next edition of that is May 7th.

Added to this the weekly Thursday night activity at Indigo and you have yourself a full week's worth of entertainment all the time (except the 3rd week of every month, there's no Sunday gig on then).

So as always, email me if you want to do a set at my gig and we'll get your comedy career rolling. Who knows, you might not suck.

How Good would this line up be?!! (See next post for actual line up)

2006-03-29T22:17:00.000+12:00

Thank you Mr Baker for this satirical look at Green Room Comedy (you can see Jarrod here, here, here, here and here)

Next lineup...

2006-03-21T09:48:00.000+12:00

After last months' succesful show this month's looks pretty awesome, we've got a healthy mix of newbies and established acts for you so to be perfectly honest, I'm excited, in my pants. The date is April 9 with kickoff around 8pm.

And the stars of that evening will be:

MC: Alex Hawley - 2005's Rookie Competition winner (he's 30!!!), now well established in the Wellington scene, Alex is fast developing quite the healthy following from middle aged housewives looking for some on the side...

Two Beers and a Yarn: Two up-and-comers who are the perfect foible for one another, it's like Perfect Strangers but instead of Balki the Greek you've got Vere the South African! These two may or may not be a couple...

Clayton Fingers: To be perfectly honest I don't know a lot about this bloke, he had the gumption to email me asking for a spot so good on him and the name? Your guess is as good as mine...

Nick Stevens: This guy got the crowd laughing along with him at this years rookie comp. despite having had two days notice and not having prepared a single thing. He did however drop his trousers, will we be in for the same treat? You'll have to come along...

Emma Olsen: The new darling of the Wellington Comedy scene, winner of this years Rookie Competition, one of the most exciting newcomers I've witnessed, we have high hopes for young Emma, come see her now before she considers herself too cool for us...

Steve Wrigley: Is there a man more synonymous with Wellington Comedy? Yes, and he looks just like this guy, Wrigley has been in the scene forever and frankly is still one of the funniest people around. He's just gotten back from the States so it's an absolute privilege to get him on stage.

So as per last time it'll be $8 or $6 concession, And just like last time if you really want to see the poster clearer, click on it. Choice.
Choice Bros

Indigo the Home of Fun

2006-03-14T14:20:00.000+13:00

This thursday night @ Indigo Bar I will be performing my legendary standup routine (alongside 5 others of little or no consequence!).

So if you're floating around Thursday night and you want something to do then for god's sake come to Indigo on Cuba St, kickoff is around 8.30 but you should get there at 8 to have a few neck-oils first
$10.

Bargain

1st Half
MC Jarrod Baker one half of something wholly funny
Matt Elliott He of recent fringe showfame
Dave Cormack <- ME!

2nd Half
MC Jerome Chandrahassen Has a strange last name!
Graham Wolf Has a cool last name!
Alex Hawley He also of recent fringe showfame and he beat me in the rookie comp last year

Rookie Night

2006-03-10T11:29:00.000+13:00

Well last night was the Wellington Comedy Club's first rookie night for 2006 and crikey dick it was successful. In my rookie comp there were some serious train wrecks (the opening act went for 12 minutes when you're allotted 5, and talked about his masturbatory habits and then did an Ode to a Fly) but last night every single act got a laugh which bodes well for the future (particularly as Green Room is a rookie night).

Congratulations must go to everyone who tried out and special congrats to Emma Olsen 2006's Rookie Competition Winner. Never before has something so offensive come out of a such a pretty mouth. She'll be appearing at the next Green Room as well as some of the other 'hot acts' of the night so it'll be a good night for all.

I was going to try and include some witty and biting satire in here but I just haven't got any so instead it might be a good idea to have a look at this site, it's humorous.

I believe I have one more spot open for a rookie who's interested in doing 5 minutes on April 9th, so if you're keen let me know asap.

Word

Advertising

2006-03-09T09:40:00.000+13:00

Tonight @ Indigo (I refuse point blank to refer to it as the San Francisco Bath House) there's a rookie comp on, I believe there are still some last minute slots available so if you've got 5 minutes of incredible comedy then email Cori
or call me on 021 2945333 and we'll see if we can get you on board.

In other news, my job is lame and I'm bored.

Oh and for those of you interested here are some helpful websites for those 'up and coming comedians'.

English site with loadsa crap on it
Wikipedia's view on standup
Just a pretty cool site

That's all bitches, and as always, email me if you wanna get on stage

Success!

2006-03-06T08:44:00.000+13:00

Well the first Green Room for 2006 has been and gone and it was a modest success if I do say so myself.

The acts were all very good and it was a fine return to form for a couple of em, the audience laughed and cried and laughed and much beer was purchased so all in all a successful night.

Here are some quotes I made up but will put in speech marks to give the false impression of truth:

"the best comedy night I've ever been to, Jerry Seinfeld had nothing"
- Joe, the punter.

"some of those jokes were inspired genius, where do they come up with that sh*t?"
- Angela, the punter.

"I did not look at any of the girls going into the toilets, you can't even see the toilets from that part of Kitty's"
- David B.P, MP.

So if you missed out last night, don't let it happen again.

I'm starting an emailing list to send out notice of upcoming dates, acts etc so if you would like to jump on that bandwagon email email me

And if you did go and couldn't get enough of it then there's two places you should check out: Here and Here

The first here is Comedy Underground, another monthly gig on Sundays, it starts on March 26th and will be equally hilarious to last night.
The second here is the Wellington Comedy Club where you can go for all sorts of information on gigs.

Most gigs in Wellington are run by very good friends of mine who are (or partnered to) comedians so know their shit.

So get out and support some local comedy, hell get out and be a local comic. You might think that New Zealand and comedy are the anti-corollary but in reality, we're not all Melody Rules ...or Mike King

Good news!

2006-03-03T09:21:00.000+13:00

Not really for any of you lot, but I just thought I'd share that I've got Rolling Stones Tickets! WOOOOOH!

Oh, and come to Green Room. Saw Peacock last night and they are in fine form.

You would be a dick to miss this gig. Seriously.
8PM!

p.s if all goes well I reckon we can engineer a battle between Optimus Prime and Cobra Commander.

The good guy and bad guy from Hasbro toys...awesome.

First Green Room Date Confirmed

2006-02-15T19:33:00.000+13:00

That's right kids and kiddettes, the first Green Room for 2006 has been confirmed and it's on March 5th at Kitty's from 8pm. The star act will be mrs.peacock.

*Warning Content Will Offend*

2 time Billy T Award nominee Cori Gonzalez-Macuer will be MCing with fellow 2 time Billy T Award nominee James Nokise also on the line up.
Not only that but there will be a prize draw with all in attendance going in the draw to win free entry to Green Room for the rest of the year!
This is an evening of hilarity not to be missed.

Tickets go on sale NOW dammit and they're $8 or $6 concession.

For bookings please email: Greenroom.Comedy@gmail.com
(click on the poster to see a larger version - you know, one you can actually read)